i'm tired but i refuse to admit cause i wna pei you .
i wna pei you cause i miss you .
i miss you cause you aren't by my side right now .
Sigh ,
i'm sorry for attitude-ing you .
i'm just really tired& miss you so much .
Hais ,
i dontknow what else to say ...
i'm sorry .

i love you, boy .
i won't leave you .
So can you don't leave me ? :')

I feel so insecure w/o hearing your voice or reading your texts .
Baby, i miss you .
Why cant you see that i only love you ?
Why can't you see that i've let go of the past ?
Why don't you believe me ?
Why don't you trust me ?
I really feel damn hurt now .
Is your love fading for me ?
I know i aint a good girlf ..
But my love for you will never fade .
Why did you say it was drifting ?
I really cant take this blow .
I wanted to talk to you .
I wanted to ask you to wake up and talk to me .
I wanted to ask you if you honestly loved me .
But seeing you so tired breaks my heart ..
I was really looking forward to today ,
but i guess all my hopes of meeting you are smashed .
I cant even meet you tml .
I alrdy can't survive not seeing you for a day or less .
I dontknow how i'm gonna survive this time ..
i dontwanna quarrel like that day ...
my heart hurts alot now ...
i wish you would wake up now ..
i wish you could text me& say, i'm on the way already .
But its impossible .
i know it wont happen .
All i wanted was for you to trust me .
I told you never to doubt me .
You said you won't anymore ..
I'm truly a failure .
I'm always making you cry .
I dontwanna anymore .
I just want you to be happy .
Baby, i miss you soo much , i wish you could see that .
I wish you would ask what nightmare did i have this morning .
You know i dreamt that, cause of one of my ex, you left me ?
I dreamt that, you didn't want to listen to my explanations .
I didn't do anyth, it was the guy all along .
And you didn't believe me or even bother listening to me .
You just threw me aside .
Do you know how scared i am that this will happen ?
I really need you in my life,
Why do you want to leave me ?
I dont understand ...
I dont want this , i dont want anything .
all i want is you .
Why don't you care ?
Sigh,
There're so many times, i was angry .
But i chose to forgive you .
When you took the phone just now,
you didn't even notice i was crying, did you ?
you didn't even ask me why i was crying .
all you did say was, 'wait ah' .
then i held on to the phone for so long ,
believing that you were doing something .
that you will pick up the phone soon and say,
'sorry, i was in the toilet' or something .
but guess what, i turned upp my phone volume .
You fell asleep .
I don't blame you or anything .
I wish i could show you how much my heart hurts right now .
I wish i could show you, how much i miss you .
I wish you could see, how much i need you .
If i continue like this,
No, i won't be broken . I'll be completely destroyed .
You understand, don't you ?
Sigh, i love you boy . Please notice that soon .
Otherwise, i might not be around when you realise that .
Not that i'm leaving you kind of not around .
Its that, i'll die& prove it to you kind of not around .
Hais,
i really hope you wake up soon, i miss you so much

I miss you so much, can you see that ? :'(

i miss you so much ...
i feel really sick now ,
i wish you were here to comfort me .
to tell me that i cant be sick .
to tell me that i still have to meet you tml .
But i've already sent you 3 msggs ,
you didn't reply any ...
are you really busy ?
or you just cant be bothered to reply ?
Sigh, i really dont know ..
I wish you would reply me ...
I wanna see your message pop up on my phone .
i wanna see your smiley face .
i wanna see you telling me that you miss me , love me .
Hais ,
i'm always asking for too much .
I'm always making you cry .
I ain't a good girlf .
I guess i'm just this huge failure ,
baby , please don't ignore me ler ..
i miss you so much, can't you see that ? Sigh ,

I'm trying hard to trust you boy .
Cause i'm becoming reliant on you already .
I already can't the life w/o "US" .
I really trust you, my trust was going stronger .
So why do i feel it all crumbling down now ?
I really can't take the blow .
Please don't lie to me .
I think i'm thinking too much again ,
so why can't i just stop all these tears ?
why cant i just trust your words ?
It was a mistake to show you this blog .
i'm sorry .
i didn't want you to cry .
i dont want you to worry .
i really dont want you to be hurt when you see me post my feelings .
all i want is you to be happy .
so i dont mind being cheated on, lied to or anything , as long as you were happy .
i admit, i'm a slut, boy .
i dont know why i am .
i just am .
I'm not as good as her .
I can never compare up to her .
Shes so good to you .
I wanna treat you better than her, ofcourse .
a hundred times better .
but i'm really afraid .
seeing those posts that shows she still love you after so long ,
really builds up the fear in me .
i dont wanna lose you .
maybe i was with you rashly .
but after spending so long ,
i've honestly fallen for you .
No guy, would have cried just cause i would cook for them before .
No guy, could make me stay awake and watch them dota .
No guy, could make me wanna take the risk, and spend the night with them .
No guy, made me feel so loved .
I've never regretted my choice, baby .
I don't know if you will , but i won't .
I'll never forget our promise .
Never to say breakup unless one is unfaithful to the other .
I really won't .
But i dontknow if i can believe that you wont ..
i really wanna believe you, boy .
but i'm so, so afraid .
would you forgive me ?
Sigh ,
i hope this nasty feelings go away soon ...
i really dont want anything to happen to us .
i love you boy .
dont doubt me please .
i've forgotten the past . i'll never go back .
i hope you've believed me after i threw away the ring outside your house just now .
i miss you :'( .
Sigh ,

I just want you to be happy.